2009 in Review.

Here's my annual review of the year. This one has had it's ups and downs, but I wouldn't ask for it any other way.

Rung in the New Year playing Rockband with my best friends. Started my last semester ever of college, with no clue where I was going to be. Continued Children's stuff at UBC. Gained a few new friends through it and couldn't ask for more. Learning and growing. Worked on a project for PBS Waco. Spent Spring Break in Waco and couldn't have wanted it any other way. Made life-long friends. Got a job in Austin, TX. Graduated May 16, 2009. Moved to Austin May 17. Started working a few days later. Met amazing people. Moved into a new apartment, which is home. Gained Stupecki baby #6, my 3rd nephew! My parents moved to Quincy, Washington. Learned about transition after college. Struggled. Spent most of September and October going to Waco. Still loving, embracing, and living. Blessed by the community I've found in Austin even if I work every Sunday morning. Great 23rd birthday with old and new friends! New Thanksgiving traditions with my immediate family in Houston. Random trip to Fredericksburg for a day. Gained an internship. New Christmas traditions. Random trip to Amarillo to see 6 amazing girls. Lost the internship I hadn't even started. Completely encourage and loved by my Soma community. Finished 2009 at work and then with a few great people.

What to look forward to in 2010:
-TRIP TO WASHINGTON!!!!
-Hopeful prospects of jobs
-Learning more
-Loving, embracing, and living
-Watching one of my best friends get married and being part of it
-Continued growth with the Soma community
-Hopeful trip to Ohio to meet the newest addition and see my sisters!

Ephesians 4

Yesterday was quite possibly one of the most blessed days I've had in a while. Below is what I read yesterday morning and it's all my heart could focus on all day. It turned out I got to spend the afternoon with two great friends on two separate adventures. I then followed it up with my love for the game of volleyball. Followed by a good time with a few more friends. God's funny sometimes in His timing, but I guess He knows best right? I'm going to leave you with Ephesians 4, I think it sums up an end to a few hard weeks.

Unity in the Body of Christ

1 I therefore, a prisoner for the Lord, urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, 2 with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, 3 eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. 4 There is one body and one Spirit—just as you were called to the one hope that belongs to your call— 5 one Lord, one faith, one baptism, 6 one God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all. 7 But grace was given to each one of us according to the measure of Christ's gift. 8 Therefore it says,

“When he ascended on high he led a host of captives,
and he gave gifts to men.”

9 (In saying, “He ascended,” what does it mean but that he had also descended into the lower regions, the earth? 10 He who descended is the one who also ascended far above all the heavens, that he might fill all things.) 11 And he gave the apostles, the prophets, the evangelists, the shepherds and teachers, 12 to equip the saints for the work of ministry, for building up the body of Christ, 13 until we all attain to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to mature manhood, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ, 14 so that we may no longer be children, tossed to and fro by the waves and carried about by every wind of doctrine, by human cunning, by craftiness in deceitful schemes. 15 Rather, speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ, 16 from whom the whole body, joined and held together by every joint with which it is equipped, when each part is working properly, makes the body grow so that it builds itself up in love.

The New Life

17 Now this I say and testify in the Lord, that you must no longer walk as the Gentiles do, in the futility of their minds. 18 They are darkened in their understanding, alienated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them, due to their hardness of heart. 19 They have become callous and have given themselves up to sensuality, greedy to practice every kind of impurity. 20 But that is not the way you learned Christ!— 21 assuming that you have heard about him and were taught in him, as the truth is in Jesus, 22 to put off your old self, which belongs to your former manner of life and is corrupt through deceitful desires, 23 and to be renewed in the spirit of your minds, 24 and to put on the new self, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness.

25 Therefore, having put away falsehood, let each one of you speak the truth with his neighbor, for we are members one of another. 26 Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, 27 and give no opportunity to the devil. 28 Let the thief no longer steal, but rather let him labor, doing honest work with his own hands, so that he may have something to share with anyone in need. 29 Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear. 30 And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. 31 Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. 32 Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.

When did I become emotional?

So it's been awhile since I last wrote anything. Like 3 months almost to the day. I love Austin and life here and the people here and the church I've found. Today is 90 days at my job and I was given the day off to relax. I don't know if relaxing is something that I'm really able to comprehend right now. There has been so much that's been going on in my life in the past week and a half it has just turned me to an emotional wreck, which isn't normal. I don't cry, but I have been and I'm ok with it. This morning I thought I would go for a run out at Town Lake to just release all frustrations and emotions...I didn't make it very far. I made it about a mile to a little sitting area on the Zilker park side that faces downtown. I sat down and thought oh I will sit here for a few minutes...a few minutes turned into 20. I just sat and overlooked downtown and just let my emotions go. Of all songs that came on I just listened to Ray Lamontagne's words in his song "Be Here Now". Who would think Ray Lamontagne would have words of wisdom for me today...not me. I posted the lyrics below. It's what I need to know today...I can't continue to let myself get more and more weary.

Don't let your mind get weary and confused
Your will be still, don't try
Don't let your heart get heavy child
Inside you there's a strength that lies

Don't let your soul get lonely child
It's only time, it will go by
Don't look for love in faces, places
It's in you, that's where you'll find kindness

Be here now, here now
Be here now, here now

Don't lose your faith in me
And I will try not to lose faith in you
Don't put your trust in walls
'Cause walls will only crush you when they fall

Be here now, here now
Be here now, here now

Home.

Well here I sit at my new home in Austin, TX. This is something I never expected to be doing or really saying. I got a job down here that I started a few days after graduation. No it's not something that I went to Baylor University and paid hundreds of thousands of dollars to do, but it's a job and it's a foot in the door in the hotel/resort industry.

I also didn't know very many people moving down here, I knew a few guys and that was about it. So, my first week of living here was weird, I knew nobody. Thankfully Sunday morning came quicker than expected and I met some more than amazing people and am for sure amazed at how easily they accepted me.

Here are a few pictures of some of the amazing girls I met a week ago...

Austin.

Well. As of 10 a.m. yesterday morning I had taken my last final ever in college. It was a huge weight lifted off my shoulders, so I celebrated by going to an Italian lunch buffet and getting my haircut. By 2 p.m. I had been offered a job (yes a real job) in Austin! Stress? I don't know that word anymore. I told them I would call them back on Monday and let them know my official decision. (pretty sure it's going to be a yes though :) I also have an event planner that I can shadow in Austin...which is a plus. And I have a church that wants me to do kids stuff? And I know someone that needs a subleaser?

Can we talk about how perfect God's timing is....not mine.

That's my life and I don't know what more to say, other than this is the weirdest feeling ever.

School?

Well, I have officially done everything I can to not be doing school work. I have hand washed clothes that needed to be, I have sorted and washed all of my other clothes, cleaned my room, cleaned the kitchen, cleaned the living room, perused facebook, my most read blogs, caught up on the news....and now I'm blogging. My roommate should watch out, her room might be my next chore. I don't know why, but for some reason I'm just not motivated to do school work anymore. I mean I have 5 official days left of class. And I have 4 full weeks left in Waco.

Then what you ask...good question. As of right now I have a pending interview with Banana Republic in Dallas and a pending internship with an Event Coordinator in Dallas. Now that my hectic week is over, I can actually catch back up with the people in charge of both of those and move them from pending to official :)

Other than school, I've just been busy with the usual, church, school, and meetings for school. I hope that you all are all doing well...

Where do I begin?

So maybe it's been a while, as in months. Really where do I begin? Do I begin with rejections, new friends, frustrations, excitements, thoughts, feelings, what?

What has happened since 2008 ended and 2009 began? Well, I started my final semester of school?!?! Wow! It has been a good semester though, with little complaints. Maybe it's just so busy I don't have time to complain?

I've been applying like crazy to jobs and getting rejected like crazy by those same companies. It's a vicious cycle, but I know that somewhere out there is the perfect job! :) I am waiting to hear back from two interviews that were a few weeks ago...I'm hoping for the best!

I'm also still doing 13 hours of school, plus meetings for every class, plus 10.5 hours of work, and on top of that 10ish hours a week to the UBC Children's ministry. I've thoroughly enjoyed my semester though. I've gotten to know a lot of people better and am sad to be leaving Waco soon. (that is if I find a job :) It is a weird place to be right now, Waco has become home and leaving seems like such a weird thought...can I just stay in college forever without the school or work part? I like my friends here...

As for the most exciting recent news, I have a newly engaged best friend! :) It is really exciting, but yet a little weird (are we actually old enough?!). She has found from what I hear an amazing guy...maybe one day we will meet, hopefully before the big day! Love you Schmissy!
Well, as for now that's all I can think of, in short. If you want to know more you should call me or something. I promise to update before my big day...May 16...graduation!

2008 in Review

Life seemed to be a rollercoaster at the start of 2008. I learned a lot. I lost 2 people close to some I truly love. My sister and her family had to learn to get along without having Joe's parents around. I had to learn how to let myself grow. I finally saw where I had fallen and had to learn to pick myself up. I found myself again amongst a group of friends I've been blessed to have since my freshman year at Baylor. I got a new job and truly met some great people and do miss working with them, just not working at the store. I moved to a new apartment. What a blessing!!! I let myself live life to the fullest and not have any worries. I grew closer to some people in Waco and learned to love the city itself. I met new people and started wondering why in the world it took me until my SENIOR year to meet them. I started a new job on campus and really am blessed by the people I work with. I am honored to be the interim Children's director at UBC. It has taught me a lot. Of course I am blessed by my best friends from home, I don't know anyone else that is as lucky as I am. I have started to finally learn that maybe I should be an event planner, maybe I should listen to those that know me well better? I got to be there when two of my good friends finally tied that knot. It was such a blessed day.

Things to look forward to in 2009:
-Graduation?
-A real job?
-Moving away from Waco?
-Becoming a real adult?
-Living my life to the fullest everyday!

Life as of recent

The fall semester is coming to a close, I have one more day this week, one day next week, a full week, and then one final day. Then it's time for finals and the wedding of the century. Hahaha, ok maybe not of the century, but it feels like it :)

I never knew how time consuming and even slightly frustrating it would be to be put in charge of the children's ministry at UBC. It's been a learning process that is for sure. I now understand why we normally have someone last a year or two at the most. It is A LOT of work. More than anyone could imagine. I was blessed to fill the shoes of an incredible woman who had lessons already planned out for me for the whole semester. Even with that though, it's been tough making sure I have teachers every week, have the supplies needed every week, have lessons, etc. etc. etc. Next semester should be interesting, but thankfully I have more free time on my hands (I think and hope).

Speaking of next semester...only 13 more hours and I'm a graduate of Baylor University!? Sic 'em. The time I have spent here I wouldn't change for anything. I wouldn't go anywhere else or do anything else. I have been blessed with some amazing friends here and I hope that I can continue those friendships even a year from now when we all start parting ways. I have learned a lot about myself while I've been here too. I feel like what I'm saying is what Erin said to me the other night at dinner, but the more I think about it, the more she was right. We really have grown and learned a lot about ourselves in the 4 years we have devoted to our respective schools. I have tried new things (maybe some weren't for the better) and I have fallen and learned to pick myself up. I have grown in faith and even struggled with faith. I have learned things about myself I would have never known without trying new things. I definitely wouldn't change the past 4 years at all.

Love God. Embrace Beauty. Live Life to the Fullest.

Live. And Live Well. BREATHE. Breathe in and Breathe deeply. Be PRESENT. Do not be past. Do not be future. Be now. On a crystal clear, breezy 70 degree day, roll down the windows and FEEL the wind against your skin. Feel the warmth of the sun.
If you run, then allow those first few breaths on a cool Autumn day to FREEZE your lungs and do not just be alarmed, be ALIVE. Get knee-deep in a novel and LOSE track of time.
If you bike, pedal HARD… and if you crash then crash well.
Feel the SATISFACTION of a job well done—a paper well-written, a project thoroughly completed, a play well-performed. If you must wipe the snot from your 3-year old’s nose, don’t be disgusted if the Kleenex didn’t catch it all… because soon he’ll be wiping his own.
If you’ve recently experienced loss, then GRIEVE. And Grieve well. At the table with friends and family, LAUGH. If you’re eating and laughing at the same time, then might as well laugh until you puke. And if you eat, then SMELL. The aromas are not impediments to your day. Steak on the grill, coffee beans freshly ground, cookies in the oven. And TASTE. Taste every ounce of flavor. Taste every ounce of friendship. Taste every ounce of Life. Because-it-is-most-definitely-a-Gift.
-Kyle Lake (6.12.72-10.30.05)

Something new

So, it's been a while since I updated my life. Not much has been going on, other than just the busy school stuff you know. Can you all believe it's October already!?! Because I can't, it's crazy that it's already this far into the semester.

I have a little update though for you all. I've been thinking about and wanting to help out with the children's ministry more at UBC. Our director is pregnant and she is due in about 8 weeks. So I've wanted to email her and try to help her with things so she has less stress. Well, I keep forgetting to email her.

So tonight I was in the drive-thru line at Starbucks and I get a phone call from our Community Pastor at UBC. He is talking about wanting Blueberry donuts, etc. from the Donut Stop then says he has an important question for me. He is talking about how Amanda (our children's director) is about to "retire" when she has Everett in a few weeks. So they are looking for an interim and they were wondering if I wanted to do it. All I could say was wow. It's something I've been thinking about a lot and it's just crazy that it all happened before I did anything.

Gosh it's so crazy. I'm pretty excited for this! Maybe not as excited as I am about us planning a roadtrip!

Best Birthday Ever.

Seriously, 22 might have actually been my favorite birthday ever. Here are a few pictures from it.

The flowers my parents sent me:

The rest are of the photo book from you all :) 64 pages of goodness, these are just a few...

Complacency

I've become somewhat complacent to the fact that David Crowder is my worship pastor at church. Anymore I don't really listen to what Dave is singing, I just sing and go on my way. Today though, something different happened. I was sitting in the hall alone during worship and really just started listening to and thinking about the words Dave was singing and it become real to me.

The first song I started paying attention to was "You Are My Joy." I mean just the title alone really says it all. You are my JOY Father. There are plenty of times though that I don't allow Him to be my joy. I just need to follow the lyrics of the song and let myself go and let Father be my joy.

The next song he sang was "Wholly Yours." The word wholly isn't one we see often or really hear often. The definition of wholly from Merriam-Webster is: to the full or entire extent; to the exclusion of other things. Holy on the other hand is something we hear and use often, maybe even overuse. The definition of Holy from my Life Application Study Bible is: worthy of worship or veneration; sacred; divine; consecrated or set apart of sacred use; living according to a highly moral spiritual system.

1 Kings 8:61 says: "Let your heart therefore be wholly devoted to the LORD our God, to walk in His statutes and to keep His commandments, as at this day."

Why can't I just wholly devote myself to God, because He is my joy? This is something that played through my mind this morning while I was sitting there. Not only do I want to be holy but I also want to be wholly devoted to the one that is my joy.

22.

22 years old. I'm an adult. I go into the real world in May. Where did the days of playing house and pretending to be grown up go? Those days are all slowly becoming a reality now. I have done a lot and seen a lot in the short 22 years I have been around. I have done more than some can even imagine and I take it all for granted sometimes. I have been so blessed in my short life and I also take that for granted too.

Over the past year I have experienced things in life that I never have before, hurt like I never before, and regret things like never before. All of those things are in the past though and they are things to learn from, not dwell on. A phrase that I have kept very tight to me through everything over the past year is "Live, Love, Learn." To me I just need to live my life to the fullest everyday. I need to love all. And learn so much from the Lord and about life.

I am thankful for the friends I have been blessed with for the past 22 years. The friends from home and from college. I can't even put to words what my friends have meant to me. They have been there for words of encouragement and for the few tears I've shed and for heartbreak and of course for the best laughter ever. They can never know how much they mean to me.

The past 22 years have been amazing and I'm excited to see what the Lord has for me for the next 22 years.

Just another little blessing in my life:

1 week down

Life recently has been well, I don't really know how to describe it. Confusing? Exciting? Busy? I guess all of those are words that have described this past week. As I sit here and watch CNN this morning about Mr. Gustav, I can only think about what I read last night and ended up re-reading this morning. Last night I read 1 Peter and something I noticed throughout this book was how it talks about loving EVERYONE. He says in 1 Peter 2:17 to "Show proper respect to everyone: Love the brotherhood of believers, fear God, honor the king." No only to the brotherhood of believers though, because in 4:8 it says: "Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins."

I think loving others even if they are not in the "brotherhood of believers" comes from what else this book is talking about, which is self-control. In 1:13 it says, "therefore prepare your minds for action; be self-controlled; set your hope fully on the grace to be given you when Jesus Christ is revealed." At the end it is reiterated pretty strongly in saying, "Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that your brothers throughout the world are undergoing the same kind of sufferings."

I think without any of this and being reminded of this we can fall in such a trap. And I think that's where I was for so long. I was not self-controlled and standing firm in my faith. I was not loving others deeply like I should. Maybe that's why I am ok with being friendly to people that have hurt me. I just want to fall more in love with people this year and more in love with our amazing Father that has so much mercy and grace towards us, even when I don't feel I deserve it.

I miss you all and hope that being back in real life at school, etc. is going well for you! Keelie and Kristin best of luck this week as you go into the real world. Erin, I hope your second week goes well...not many more left for you! Shayla, freakin write something and update us on your life. As for the others that have come across this, I miss you all too and hope you are having fun on your adventures! :)

2 1/2 years ago...

So on my long boring drive today I realized that 2 1/2 years ago we were all in Dallas together and we watched the Winter Olympics together. I'm pretty sure that's where this came from: "Hey honey during the last winter olympics one of my friends said she ate crap."

I'm glad we can all be entertained so easily, especially by the Olympics. Maybe for our reunions later in life we should consider planning them during the Olympics every two years for sure. Maybe we can find a new puzzle every time too....
I have the first day jitters also...or maybe it's just the fact that I don't want to go back. I'm a little intimidated by the fact that I'm a senior, what am I even going to do when I graduate? I have no answer to that...

Family

I just spent the past week in Cleveland with my sisters, nieces, and nephews. It really makes me want to move up there when I graduate, I feel like I'm missing something you know? Who knows, we will see, but here are a few pictures:Cleveland from Lakewood Park boardwalk

My sisters and I, oh and little peep got in the pic

Marissa, she hit the teen years pretty hard, she doesn't want to be associated with her family, etc.

Katie (14) and Michael (6), just take note of Michael's face, it's pure joy

Cassandra (3) and Stephen (18 months)...this family loves to swing, try to take Steve out and he will scream his head off

I should be asleep right now...

I'm like a little kid sometimes, mainly because I can't wait for 2:30 tomorrow to come around. Why you ask? I mean I would like to say I'm going to New York with Erin and Keelie but it's not that easy. Although, I am going to Austin with Kristin and can't wait! It's going to be so nice to get away from Waco and everything here. We are so lucky to have each other, because like Keelie always says nobody else really has a group of friends like us.

I have gotten to the point in my life where I don't want to do anything, but sit at home and spend quality time with people. Recently that's really all I've done, actually that's pretty much all I've done this summer. It's weird, but it hasn't bothered me one bit. I mean I've hung out with all of my friends here, but when it comes to going out places I would rather just stay home and save money. I think God is preparing me for life after college, it's not all party after this and I'm ok with that. It was a waste of time to some extent...

Also, I think I have found a semi-answer to my question a few posts again...the one about what I'm going to do when I graduate. Well, this past weekend my cousin got married and I did the whole reception, I did the lay out, I hosted it, whatever you can think I probably did. It was so fun and I enjoyed doing it. So...event planner? Ha me...I know, I know... Who would have ever thought I could possibly professionally plan things some day...

Can we all just live in the same city again please?

Too Nice?

I've been told I'm a really nice person to pretty much anyone. Although, because I am I tend to let people walk all over me. And by people I mean friends, and by friends I mean ones I'm pretty close to and spend time with daily. So why does this always seem to happen to me? It's so frustrating, because I never know what I do, but sometimes people that I thought I was good friends with just stop talking to me. What did I do? It hurts. But then the next time someone decides to come around again and be friends, I'm just too nice and feel bad for them. Why is it so hard for me just to say no and let that person know I've been hurt. Am I too nice?

I guess so, but then when I hit this point I realize I've been lucky to have amazing best friends from home. They are the ones that you can go a year without seeing but seem to always pick up right where you left off the last time. I love that. I love them. I mean I guess I should say I love you all, because you are probably the only ones to read this. I also miss you all!

Where do you find joy?

This morning at church we had a question posed before us. Where do you find joy? Then Josh said, "ok, discuss this with your neighbor."

So at first I thought, I'm too good for this, but then Tricia and I were talking about this thought and knew Josh could call on us any second to share our thoughts. So, I thought about it and I truly find joy in God's beauty outside. I LOVE sunsets, they are the most gorgeous thing ever, it's a little gift from God everyday. I truly just enjoy sitting outside and being in God's precious land. He created such beauty and sometimes we take it for granted. I find the most joy when I'm just sitting in the company of my friends outside, maybe on Shayla's porch, or maybe just someone's backyard. It could be day or night, daytime I like just watching everything in action and seeing the beautiful colors. At night I just enjoy watching the sunset and the stars come out. It's so beautiful.

Where do you find your joy? It's not something we think about everyday, but what truly makes us happy and where do we find God?